When you get married you are thinking of the foreverness of it all - a life with your partner by your side, someone you can confide in and who has your back, exciting times a head, a home, a family, the feeling that this is what life is all about. For some though, this dream is cut short.
Jen Zwinck will never forget the moment that changed her life. In 2011, her husband was walking home from a bachelor party when he was attacked, robbed, and killed. Jen instantly became a young widow, left to raise their two year old daughter alone. Overcome with grief and anxiety over the loss, Jen chose her own unique path to heal. She packed 4 suitcases and moved with her daughter to a tiny island in the Caribbean where she knew no one.The years she spent on the island gave Jen the time to process the loss and rebuild her own strength and find the courage to move forward.
Jen is now a Podcast host, Co-founder of the Widow Squad Online Community, Widow advocate, & Author, and in 2017 she remarried, a year later welcomed another wonderful daughter into their family - so now they are enjoying a fun and crazy life in South Louisiana as a family of four.
In this episode, Jen shares the following:
[00:02:42] my favorite memories are about us going out on our boat.
[00:11:16] it's 10 o'clock at night or whatever. But the, one of the detectives came up to me and he just said, okay ma'am, we just need you to go home and try and get some sleep and just let us do our job. And I was like, what did he just say to me?
[00:18:17] I asked myself and I beat myself up over that. Like, why couldn't I just be that, that, that nagging wife that is like, no, you can't go. Stay home
[00:22:33] I said, I have to go, I have to get outta here. I have to do something. I can't be here.
[00:26:39] I have got to figure this out, trying to be a mom now on my own. And so, that was my plan.
[00:34:33] It kept me grounded, it kept me safe. It really kept the anxiety at bay
[00:38:51] I feel like that time that we had together, it was the best decision that I, I've ever made
[00:39:41] I want people to know that the pain that they are feeling is not going to be forever
[00:41:49] you are in this time warp. Really. Time is so tricky with, with grief
[00:44:03] And I went down the line of those of those widow friends that I was telling you about, and I interviewed them. And the whole concept and the whole mission behind the podcast was to put out these stories of hope
[00:47:08] Some people, I mean, they don't, they don't have what I had with my, with my widow girls.
[00:50:19] that's the big one, is the guilt because so many people feel like they are still married. They, they just feel like that, that's, that's still their husband.
[00:52:13] And so they they stay in that, in that widow box, and they stay where they don't really want to be.
[00:52:52] Yes, I put together a whole program about it. It's date about dating after loss
... and so much more!
Quote:
"Whatever moment you are in, just put your hand on your heart and go back to that memory and that love of them". ~ Jennifer Zwinck
Resources:
Jen's links:
Feeling lonely?? Access this free presentation on how to handle loneliness after loss
https://www.widow180.com/lonely -
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And thanks, Gabe Dovaston for the great music! www.themusicacademypapamoa.com
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