The Beautiful Side of Grief - 99. If You Don't Own It, It Owns You

Wednesday, October 11, 2023

Show Notes

Parenting - best job in the world, right?

Not if you lose a precious child in unimaginable circumstances.

Not if you are a parent having to hide the shame, guilt and embarrassment of the choices of your children make.

When her young teen boys found themselves caught up in substance abuse, Marsha Vanwynsberghe desperately sought a solution to help them. It was a dark, hidden world of masks, shame, guilt and hidden voices. Marsha decided to speak up. In doing so, she discovered that by freeing herself she freed her boys. As she confronted the difficult stuff she found her own story, and the courage to help others find and share their stories. As a precursor, Marsha also takes us on a journey of child loss in unimaginable circumstances and the impacts of that, on herself, her husband and their boys.

This is a powerful episode full of hope. Full of courage. Full of information to help you rebuild your life to be able to fully find the light within. Our lives are full of mistakes. It's taking ownership of them that makes the difference.

Marsha's Bio

Years ago, in the midst of dealing with teen substance abuse, I lost my voice, my drive, and shame and judgment ruled my life. I was consumed with trying to fix, manage and control others. When I started to share my story on small stages, online, on podcasts, I could have never predicted that I would find my soul's purpose. I learned that I wasn't alone in my pain, and realized that the reasons we tend to feel alone is because we don't like to talk about the difficult things/parts/and stories in our lives. It became a personal mission to share my vulnerable story more openly. I wrote in 3 collaborative books, spoke on stages, launched my podcast, Own Your Choices Own Your Life, and released my bestselling solo book, When She Stopped Asking Why. Since then, I have been published 7 xs, launched a second podcast, created a brand new business from scratch during a pandemic, recovered from full back surgery, and am more passionate than ever that our stories are meant to be shared to serve, support and impact others. I am now an NLP Master Practitioner and Trainer, and have created a certification to support people in using NLP techniques to heal from their stories, craft their talk from stage, from a podcast, write their book, or grow their business. In addition, I see creating a publishing house to support people in sharing their stories, supporting authors and becoming published authors. Through these tools, NLP certifications, programs, coaching and two podcasts, I will continue to teach the power of Radical Responsibility and Owning Our Choices in our own life. I empower men and women how to own and stand on their stories, be conscious leaders and build profitable platform businesses that create massive impact.

In this episode, Marsha shares the following:

[00:01:14] Fur babies

[00:02:54] Intuitively knowing to get a dog

[00:04:50] Marsha's background

[00:07:10] The loss of Izzy

[00:10:05] Findiing a mass

[00:11:12] What the next six years looked like

[00:13:27] How the pregnancy saved her life

[00:14:51] The impact of chronic illess on the family

[00:16:12] How people view the loss of a child pre full-term

[00:18:45] Viewing miscarriages from the spouse's perspective

[00:21:18] When things go awry that the fighter-fixer can't fix

[00:24:07] Not your problem to solve

[00:25:08] Finding a parent group that fit and the 100,000 mom fb group

[00:26:18] Healing to share her journey

[00:30:12] Not being in control and taking responsibility

[00:32:23] Understanding change doesn't come from a space of blame

[00:34:44] You don't get to pick and choose their behaviours

[00:35:00] Taking care of self changed how she responded which changed what happened

[00:38:44] Life with no regrets and who owns the problem

[00:39:42] Leading yourself

[00:41:55] Healing and sharing her story

[00:46:24] Letting the masks fall away

[00:47:10] Advice for others wanting to share their story

[00:49:00] If you don't own the story it owns you

... and so much more!

Quote:

"I learned how to take care of myself, which changed how I was responding to what was happening, which started to change what was happening." ~ Marsha Vanwynsberghe

Resources:

Marsha's links:

Website: https://www.marshavanw.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/marsha.vanwynsberghe

IG: https://www.instagram.com/marshavanw/?hl=en

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@marshavanw

YouTube: https://bit.ly/3Dmk75q

Follow me on:

Instagram: https://instagram.com/beautifulsideofgrief

Facebook: https://facebook.com/thebeautifulsideofgrief

Website: https://thebeautifulsideofgrief.com

Email: thebeautifulsideofgrief@gmail.com